What In The Hell Do You Do All Day?
“What in the hell do you do all day?”
It’s the number one question stay-at-home moms get asked. I could bore you with details of my time being filled with household cleaning, errand running, volunteering, or fulfilling the need for “just me” time.
However, the truth is, I really don’t know what in the hell I do all day. There, I said it.
If you are sick and tired of people (meaning your husband) asking you, “What in the hell do you do all day?” use these responses straight from the corporate world to shut them the hell up:
- “What in the hell do you do all day?” Answer a question with a question. Nothing gets someone’s blood boiling more than to turn the tables. For example, ask to see a call sheet if your husband is in sales or ask to speak to one of his nurses if he’s a doctor.
- “I posted for a new position.” What bigger turn on to a husband than to get him excited about having additional income. Take a few minutes from reading mom blogs to pull up monster.com a few times in case he’s snooping in the browser history.
- “I read some trade magazines.” If you want to sharpen your skills, you gotta read up. Cooking Light, Better Homes and Gardens, Real Simpleand Martha Stewart Living are essential reads to educate yourself on housewife duties, while simultaneously doing nothing. If you throwCosmopolitan into the mix, just beware that you may be asked to demonstrate what you’ve learned in the token, “How To Please Your Man”article.
- “I had an all day retreat.” He doesn’t have to know you were at the mall all day. Just make sure you pick a place in your closet where he never looks to hide the shopping bags.
- “I spent my entire day on the phone.” This answer can serve double-duty when he asks you how many times your mother called during the day.
And the best answer to the question, “What in the hell do you do all day?”
None of your fucking business!
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Perfect. I am a working mom and yet, I still related to this! #1 is terrific.
Thanks. #1 is my personal favorite for diverting the conversation.
Seriously, Terri, I was going to blog about this in my next post! This question drives me up the wall. I’ll contribute an answer #7: “Well, I didn’t get an hour-long lunch break, I can tell you that much.” Perhaps the most obnoxious part is that when I do start to answer, the questioner tends to start tuning out. I suppose I could just stop feeling so defensive about it. Not likely.
- Sarah
Write your post. I’m curious about your responses. I like one of your first posts about telling Randy about Lucy and Ethel’s escapades and he thinks you are nuts. Only someone who stays home can appreciate that conversation – and Lucy!
You are the absolute best! My Saturday morning coffee is tasting so much better.
Glad you can feel more comfortable about doing nothing now and can enjoy your coffee!
lol